Hellsing: Party tricks
by Tina senpai
Summary: The miscreants are up to their usual tricks again! This time, theirs a party ; Let's see what happens when we add fancy dress into the mix!


~Chapter 1: Casual~

"I feel ridiculous." Integra folded her arms over her chest and refused to look at anybody, choosing to glare at her now empty wineglass on the table.

"You look it as vell, don't vorry." Zurin snickered as she walked past, one hand holding a glass of orange juice whilst the other patted the small bump that was her stomach.

Integra' glare could have burned a hole through a wall, but she decided to let it lie, knowing there was nothing she could do to a pregnant woman.

Again, the Hellsing mansion had welcomed visitors openly to their party night, the invitations stating fancy dress. Of course for some people, that actually meant dressing in outrageous or eye-catching costumes.

Integra had been purposefully squished into a corseted, puffy blue dress, with lots of glitter and high-heeled shoes and her hair all done up. The big give away of who she was, was the glass slippers she wore on her feet. She vowed that Walter would have to do extra clean-up for a whole year, but he wasn't completely bothered. He was just happy that he'd managed to finally get her into a dress for longer than a few minutes.

Walter himself wasn't completely noticeable at first, but it was only when Pip and Seras insisted on the sunglasses, did people realise he'd put on a darker shade of suit and better tie to resemble a 'reservoir dog'. He even had a gun on his tray, encase anyone got a little bit 'grabby'.

Seras and Pip where cuddled up in a corner, 'necking' (as Walter called it) whilst people struggled to see their costumes. Seras wore a small black dress, little bows around the hem of the skirt and the top as well, a tail sticking out and added bits of 'fur' to give her that 'little kitten' look. It was the ears and even the small paw gloves that people fathomed it was Pip' idea, especially with Seras hands every where on his own body at her own idea for his costume. He was dressed in a long, white flowing poet' shirt, grey breeches, a black leather belt around his waist and black leather gloves (which were currently all over Seras' hips and rump.) They knew they would have to restrain Yumie when she saw Pip dressed as the goblin king.

Alucard was seated near the fire, his eyes roaming the room in boredom as he had nothing (or no-one) to play with. He was dressed in a beautifully made tuxedo, a long cape pulled around the side of him and obscuring his one side which hid where he kept the blood packs. It was the white mask, which covered the top right half of his face that people knew he was the 'Phantom of the opera'. And somehow, he suited the title perfectly.

The scattered Millennium' were a sight for everyone else. Major was dressed in a tight red spandex suit (which Pip couldn't stop gagging at) with horns, tiny bat wings and even a tail as he sauntered about around the food table, his little devil side something Integra didn't like as much as she thought (he kept asking her if she wanted to join him in his own hell.)

Dok was the only one people instantly recognised. For although he wore the same clothes (blood stains added for free) Dok had purposefully electrocuted himself and then sprayed on a little hairspray to hold it, for that perfect 'Doctor Frankenstein' look. He'd even added a new set of goggles.

Zurin was busy flitting about, keeping her energy up and having an excitable Jan chase after her, like a little puppy. She was about 6 months pregnant (already HUGE) and there had already been some changes in their lifestyle. Although she agreed to give up the booze, cigarettes and even her coarse language (she knew the baby could hear every word) she managed to keep one or two of her favourite things. Like smacking Jan about. Spouse abuse was ok with her and everyone else, just because it was Jan. She was wearing a small skirt and top, both made out of what looked like fire. She had painted more symbols onto the other side of her body and instead of her scythe, she carried around a large spear (which she also used to lean on when she felt tired).

Jan, was quite happy with his costume. He'd already freaked out Seras and Rip with it and was pleased that his 'character' was so effective. Truth be told, he'd gone really gory and bloodied himself beyond redemption, even letting Zurin hack into him a little bit to create the perfect 'Zombie ghoul' costume.

His brother was busy trying to look cool whilst trying to shift comfortably in his seat with his heavy costume. At his obvious attempt to impress Rip (who was looking at him most of the time) Luke had chosen to wear the battle uniform of a Roman centurion, a full breastplate and even a sword. Unfortunately, due to the fact he had quite a small frame and he really wanted to impress Rip, he thought the bigger outfit would do better. Unlucky for him that it was also heavier.

Rip however was quite successful with her costume. She'd picked out a full length, LEATHER catsuit and was strutting around, squeaking away and surprised at how many people were staring. Including Integra. Hans was following her around like a puppy, Rip claiming he was part of her costume. He was just walking around shirtless but no one questioned why. In fact, Integra, Seras and Zurin all complimented him on his outfit.

Schrödinger was prancing about, excitedly awaiting his 'auntie Yumiko' arrival, his outfit 'one he had to show her'. He'd specifically chosen a pretty pink dress with all the matching accessories, even asking Doc to help him find some hair extensions. Luckily, a few of the experiments and volunteers had kindly left their hair behind and Doc made a set of pretty curls from it, which he sowed carefully into Schrödinger' head.

The Iscariots had yet to arrive, Anderson obviously having engine trouble (or as the others called it 'asking for directions' trouble) and everyone had been waiting patiently for them, until finally, Walter announced them.

Slowly, they entered the room, one by one and hurriedly, some embarrassed at their costumes.

Anderson couldn't stand the eyes on him, his blush evident underneath his large mane and painted face, the tiger suit far to adorable on him than it should have possibly been. He couldn't ignore Integra' hand grabbed at his tail and pulling him backwards towards her and the sofa, all the while a large smile on her face. She really did approve of his costume and it's great attributes.

Heinkel was next, a small grunt of approval and humour from Hans as she wandered in in his attire, her slightly darker hair a give away to who it could possibly be in a replica of his outfit. She even had his collar pulled up exactly the same place he had his. Immediately, she walked over towards him and nodded, not saying a word. He replied by fiddling with her hat, pretending to adjust it.

The next person through the doors received a few startled gasps and even Alucard was shocked. Yumiko was dressed in a long, pinkish dress, which clung to her perfectly. The most spectacular part was the wings that came out of her back. They where attached to the dress and spanned out high above her head and fluttered as if they were real. Schrödinger was even careful when he hugged her, telling her he was afraid to break an 'angel'.

The last person in was unexpected. A lady, wearing a light pink dress, hid her face behind a fan, her slim body something that immediately got the rooms attention.

"Holy crap! Who is that?! She's...she's hot!" Jan called out, his jaw dropping onto the floor. It quickly shut back up again when he received a sharp smack on the back of his head.

"I know it's true, but I can still beat you for it." Zurin glared at him before turning her attention back to the 'eye candy' who had just entered the room.

Almost immediately, the woman dropped the fan and turned towards Anderson, few of the rooms occupants instantly recognising the made-up face.

"I told you this was a ridiculous costume Alex!" It was the voice that was the biggest give-away.

"MAXWELL?! OH MY GOODNESS!" Seras looked the most gobsmacked as all the others laughed their asses off. Even Walter couldn't help but chuckle as Maxwell lifted his skirts to stomp down the stairs in his heeled shoes and shaved legs.

It gave Yumiko the perfect opportunity to talk to Heinkel without anyone noticing.

"Heinkel, I feel so...uncomfortable like this." She rubbed her bare arms and watched as her boss complained and smacked away the hands that reached to lift up his skirt and look at his legs again.

"Stop complaining! Me and Yumie both had to pluck a lot of chickens to get you those feathers." Heinkel merely shrugged her off, quickly stalking off to help lift her bosses skirt.

"...I was wondering why I felt so itchy!" Yumiko threw her hands in the air in frustration, marching over to stop Heinkel from harassing Maxwell too much (whilst Alucard stalked after her to harass).


End file.
